Are You Ready for Your Family to Expand? It’s a big question, so how do you go about answering it? If you’re not sure of what you should do, it’s a good idea to ask yourself some questions. After all, you don’t want to have regrets when it’s too late. Not when we’re talking about a life decision as big as this. Of course, you will never regret having a child, but that doesn’t mean you won’t regret the timing and things like that once the pregnancy is underway.
Are You Ready for Your Family to Expand?
You need to be sure that your family is ready for taking this big next step forward. If you’re not, you will only be pushing your family into the unknown, and that could end in real disaster for you. Don’t let that happen. There are so many ways to make sure that you are getting into this whole thing at the right time and in the right way. Here is a series of questions that you should find answers to before you decide for sure whether your family is ready to expand.
Are You Financially Prepared?
The first thing you need to think about is your financial situation. Having a child and moving forward with a larger family is clearly going to cost you plenty of money in the future. That’s a commitment that you need to take very seriously. Sure, love and family are important things, but they don’t necessarily put food on the table or pay for clothes and your home. You don’t want to put your family in peril as a result of a financial planning miscalculation. So, look closely at the numbers and don’t move ahead until you’re sure that you’re in a financial position that makes this kind of life change possible.
Where Are You at in Your Careers?
These days, you shouldn’t have to choose between a family and a career. That’s great, of course. But it means that you have to think about where your career is at before you take a little time off to have the baby. If you at a point in your career where you feel like dropping out for a few months will have a detrimental impact on your future career success, you might want to hold off with these kinds of plans for a whole. Alternatively, you might want to have the child regardless of your career situation right now. But it’s something that definitely needs to be thought about before you do anything else.
Do You Have the Room in Your Home to Accommodate the Expansion?
The room you have available in your home is another important matter that you really need to pay attention to if you want this whole plan to go as smoothly as it possibly can. If you don’t have the room in your home for another child, it might mean that you need to move to a larger house before you push forward with the family expansion plans. What you don’t want to do is go through the twin stresses of moving house and having a baby at the same time. A semi detached house is ideal for families. So, if that’s what you’re looking for, clinch it before you think about pregnancy any longer.
Is it a Two-Sided Decision?
This should go without saying, but it really does need to be a two-sided decision if you’re going to go ahead with. If one person in the relationships wants a second child more than the other one does, it can be tricky, and resentments could creep in. There is no sense and no benefit in having a child if one half of the relationship is only going along with it because the other half wants it so badly. There has to be an open and honest discussion about this whole thing before you commit to anything. Not doing that will simply cause more problems in the future, and those really need to be avoided.
Are You Sure You’re Not Rushing Yourselves?
Rushing into this kind of thing is something that happens commonly. But it’s never good for you if you’re not going ahead for the right reasons. You shouldn’t feel pressured by your age or by where you are in life. If the time’s not right, it’s not right. And there is no point forcing it just because you feel like you should. Pushing yourself will just cause more problems in the long-term. It’s perfectly fine to take your time and wait for a little longer before having that second child and expanding your family.
How Will Your Other Children Adjust?
If you already have children, you will need to take their feelings into account regarding this massive decision. You don’t want them to feel resentments and have problems. Of course, these kinds of problems are never insurmountable. So, you will be able to win them round and have them accept their new brother or sister. But it’s still a good idea to think about how you’re going to talk to them about all this and how they might react to it. A poor reaction will mean that you and your partner will have to put in the work with them when you will also be focusing on the pregnancy. It’s worth considering how challenging this will be.
What’s Your Own Health Like?
Your own health situation should also inform your decision regarding whether or not you should expand your family at this current point in time. If you are not in great health or you’ve recently experienced health problems that you’re still getting over, it’s probably a good idea to wait a little longer. After all, the toll pregnancy takes on your body can be huge, and you need to be prepared for that. The experience will be even more tricky and challenging if your health and fitness are not at 100% right now. Be honest with yourself when you’re considering this factor.
Have You Thought About the Economy?
This might sound like a strange one, but the health of the economy will dictate how expensive parenthood will be and whether you will be able to afford it. It’s just as important to consider these outside factors as it is to consider your own personal financial situation. Of course, you might conclude that there is simply nothing you can do about the economy and where it heads next, and then decide to have a child anyway. That’s a perfectly respectable conclusion to reach, but you should at least consider these things, even when you’re powerless to change them.
What Are the Stress Levels in Your Life Like?
Adding a child to an already stressed out family household might well be one of the worst decisions it’s possible to make. Stress levels should be lowered before you even think about bringing a child into your family fold and your household environment. Some people see a new baby as a way of escaping their existing problems and making things nice and positive again. That’s never the right way to look at the situation, though. The stress levels will only rise when you have a new baby to look after and care for each and every day. Don’t fool yourself into thinking otherwise. As pleasant as new babies are, they’re also a lot of hard work.
Are Both Parents Going to Share the Responsibilities Involved?
The way in which parental responsibilities are shared will have a big impact on how successful this whole family expansion is. If it’s the case that one parent does all of the work while the other only gets involved in the fun stuff, it’s probably not going to work out well. Remember, the parents no longer outnumber the children when you have a second. Both of you are going to have to pull your weight if you want to make this whole thing a big success; there are no two ways about it. Discuss how responsibilities are going to be shared before you go ahead with the pregnancy. It’s the sensible way to approach this.
Have You Considered the Headaches of Pregnancy and Everything it Involves?
Many people have a rose-tinted view of pregnancy when they look back on it. But it’s not all fun and games. Remember all the challenges and problems you faced as a result of being pregnant, not to mention the morning sickness and other health problems you will have to deal with. Is that something you’re ready for once more? You need to be sure that you’re fully onboard with what you’re getting into by having another child. And if you are, that’s great! But it’s something that definitely needs to be given proper consideration first.
As you should already be aware, having a new child is a huge undertaking, and there is no guarantee that it will all pan out the way you want it to. So, consider the questions raised above before you any put any firm plans in place. You know it makes sense.
*** This is a collaborative post. Please see my disclosure section for more information